CBB The Day After The Night Before Sun 11th

CBB Sun 11th Jan Episode 

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Nadia is really turning out to be a big bore, all she does is winge and whine, she just reminds me of some old woman who has never been offended by anything and has just landed on earth, gone into the BB house and discovered other humans have different opinions.

Maybe she was in outer space with Perez, got to repeat myself, he's really is a bell end (may be I might just refer to him as that in future).

What is it with ex Coronation Street stars when they go in the BB house, I really used to be a fan of Ken (Reg Holdsworth for those of you who are over 35), Julie Goodyear turned out to be an odd ball too. 

Calum put him back in his place when Ken tried to get under his skin during the task.

I wonder if BB producers will get some ex Eastenders stars in for the next BB so we can have a comparison.

I'm loving Katie (acid tongue) Hopkins, always have and it looks like she's coming off as one of the best housemates so far, she didn't bite when "Bell End Perez" tried to out her with some old news about bonking in a field (who hasn't done that?).

Dog AKA Reality Blog

CBB Bedlam Sat 10th

CBB 2015 - Sat 10th Episode

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If you didn’t catch that tonights episode was moved from 9pm to 10pm and wonder why, then the ‘warning’ at the start of tonights CBB made it completely clear.

After only 3 days in the house, Hell has already broken out. 

Before Ken had even got the sleep out of his eyes he was being offensive, Saying he was going to the shower room to look at ladies arses and promptly trotted out there. Half the housemates thought he was joking but he then repeated himself whilst the girls were in the bathroom and had to be put in his place by Patsy.

Katie also had a go at offending everyone before they’d finished their first cuppa of the day by saying, about a Indonesian child being made to make clothes, that at least they had a job. 

Ken claims his ‘offensive’ act is to get voted out of the house but I had him pegged as a John McCririck from the start. Although it could also be a double bluff. Not only is he actually that offensive but he knows the more you say you want to go the longer they keep you in. 

First order of the day from BB was face to face voting and boy were these housemates up for that. 

The voting went as follows:

Michelle voted Ken (Wants to go home)

Perez voted Ken (Wants to go home)

Katie voted Perez (Too annoying and loud)

Nadia voted Katie (They’re polar opposites)

Cami voted Ken (Wants to go home & he called her a slut)

Jezza voted Patsy (She has a Auto Immune and that he needs to kill of the    weakest in order to become the strongest)

Chloe voted Ken (Offensive)

Calum voted Ken (Wants to go home)

Kav voted Ken (Wants to go home)

Alicia voted Calum (Safest to stay & doesn’t like her)

Patsy voted Ken (Bathroomgate)

Alex voted Perez (Control Freak & has to be centre of attention)

Cheggars voted Perez (Because he puts his arse & feet on the food surfaces)

Which means that Ken will face the public vote along with Chloe & Alexander

Perez then informed Nadia that the reason Katie voted for him is because he is her biggest competition - yep Nadia was speechless too. 

Ken then called Alexander a Negro and whilst Alexander told him it’s not ok to use that word, he did give him a chance to redeem himself. Ken however seemed to then try to use every racist word in his vocabulary. Ken was called into the Diary Room for a warning, which is no surprise given BB’s previous problems with racism. 

Then we had Jezza having a drinking competition with himself, that could only end one way and that was with his head in the toilet. Chloe went it to check he was ok and he started his philosophic nonsense and the next thing is we here Chloe explain “No! That’s not alright” and come running out in tears. 

Jeremy had pulled open her dressing gown and touched her boob. Nadia was mother hen between taking Chloe to the diary room and stopping Cami from cutting off his bollocks. 

Next thing Jeremy comes out and Calum has been elected to get his side of the story but before he can even begin Jeremy is so unaware of his actions being inappropriate that he thinks everyone is slagging off his drinking prowess. 

Jeremy was sent to the bathroom by BB and Perez had a full on hissy fit how he didn’t feel safe in the house with Jeremy. 

The other problem Jeremy had was the more he tried to defend himself the worst he made it, even eventually admitting he did touch Chloe boob ‘But only because she thought she was flirting’.

Jeremy had to sleep in a seprate area to everyone else and was eventually ejected from the house the next morning. 

In the meantime continued to make offensive comments to everyone, including those who had defended him earlier, including Perez and got himself another formal warning.

I’m just not sure if BB are just keeping Ken in because he wants to go 

What's Going On In CBB Sat 10th?

CBB 2015 - Sat 10th Episode

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OMG I hope we are all one in saying Ken (Reg) should have been evicted for that racist rant at Alexander (Criticise) O'Neal last night.

So we not only got another racist and but a sexual pervert in Jeremy, Thankfully BB gave him his marching orders and quite rightly so, still can't believe he's still trying to justify his actions?! What a total Bell End!.

And lets not forget the Drama Queen Perez, he's not feeling safe in the BB house, I think he will be the next big drama but who with?

DOG AKA Reality Blog

CBB Fri 9th Jan Real or No Real

CBB 2015 - Fri 9th Episode

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As predicted Perez is getting annoying by being loud and overbearing, many of them are calling it his fake blogger persona. Which leads, in part, to the first row  of this series, when Michelle pulls him up on ‘ditching’ her once he was famous and generally being “Cunty”. 

Michelle is on a mission and is joining the ever swelling ranks of housemates that think Katie’s niceness is fake. 

Shockingly Nadia is very Anti- American, it could be due to there being so many Americans in this series but her comments are effectively racist and there is no excuse for her behaviour. She describes it as just letting off steam but even Calum pulled her on it. 

BB hasn’t finished with Katie yet and she has a new ‘Kindness’ task. Firstly she had to name the housemates she felt were least attractive and she picked Reg, Perez and Patsy. She picked the first two for ‘Fat’ reasons, if anyone needs their head testing it’s you love. 

The twist is she has to give a foot massage to one of the above three, I was pissing myself laughing. Who doesn’t hate feet let alone touching them (other than if you have a foot fetish, of course). 

I thought she’d tell BB to f*ck off but but all good to her she massaged Perez’ feet and was rewarded by having the niceness curse removed.

I feel a bit sorry for Calum because everyone just keeps asking how Lindsay Lohan was to date and very gentlemanly he is just very vague. 

I can’t work out if Reg Holdsworth is a character that Ken Morely is playing in the house or that he didn’t need to do any acting in Corrie and was just himself. Either way it’s because he thinks it makes him cute and lovable. 

SHUT THE FRONT DOOR! Katie just welled up talking about how much she loves her husband. Clearly that affair she got caught having when she was photographed shagging a colleague in a field, has been swept under the carpet. 

Looks like Jezza might have Britney moment first, he wants Michelle to dare him to shave his beard off. She’s pointed off that it’d be no biggie if he does cos it’s not long and it’ll grow back. He’s taken that as her daring him and is now walking about mumbling excitedly to himself. No one give him an umbrella.

Classy! Cami has a tattoo on her vagina, perhaps not the best first impression on only the 2nd day but now she is showing it to Perez - in front of every one. 

Chloe and Cami are then blatanty just boob jiggling and again the judges are Jezza and Alexander. This is under the guise of showing how hard it is to model and the difference between false and real boobs. 

Finally Calum and Cami do some flirting school playground style - being mean to each other. This continues into the bedroom before they have a weird coded conversation, which I interrupted to be that they both have partners but they have permission to ‘cheat’ in the house. I can only presume for entertainment purposes and not cynical public support! There seems to be a part of Calum that’s cautious thou, like his radar is picking up possible stalker.

Sonikmummy

CBB Behaviour & Beds Thu 8th

CBB 2015 - Thu 8th Episode

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Chloe & Cami have struck up a predictable friendship, with the unoriginal tandem boob jiggling whenever possible. Constant offenders of encouraging this are Alexander & Jeremy, who couldn’t resist ‘umpiring’ the girls Arm Wrestling by the Hot Tub.

Perez being a former ‘Fatty’ has been quizzing Katie on her Fat-ist views and you can tell she is really struggling, having to be not only nice to him (in particular) but she has to say nice things about fat people.

Later on Perez discloses that he thinks Public Persona Katie Hopkins is a Character and ‘Nice’ Katie, they are seeing in the house, is the real Katie. We can all only speculate but if the Nasty is fake she won’t be able to keep that up for a month, once she starts forgetting about the cameras.

Reg just seems to raid the fridge, wander around on his own and talk to himself. 

Perez must be pissing these guys off in there, he interviews everyone like he’s speed dating. It’s definitely grating on me. 

Jeremy has been knocking back the Champagne like it’s water but claims he isn’t an Alcoholic, he just has an excessive personality. Michelle claims that this is a massive improvement in his life / behaviour. Personally I think we have an Amanda Bynes melt down in the making here. 

Due to his wandering around like he has Alzheimer's, Reg has missed out on nabbing a bed. So he now has choice but to share and Perez is the only one forthcoming with an offer. 

First words out of Reg’s mouth weren’t thank you but “Are you gay? But you have a child!”. Perez promised him there would be no funny business but it was only a couple of hours ago that Perez announced that he had a huge dick and it got erect whenever it was near anyone - regardless of the sex person.

We’re not the only ones concerned about Jezza’s behaviour either, Nadia has spoken to Michelle about it and Perez has even gone to the diary room to say his behaviour is close to crossing over to dangerous not entertaining.

Finally someone (Calum) is onto Katie, not only that her kindness & sweetness is fake but she is the villain of the house and was in fact the person that put Chloe & Alexander up! Well done Sherlock.

Sonikmummy

CBB 2015 Sees The Reality Blog Dream Team Back Together

Reality Blog Partnership Reunites!

Sonikmummy & Dog

Back as early as 2004, a colleague and I discovered we we're both huge BB fans. Then people started hanging out with us on in the break room just to hear what we thought about the previous nights episode. 

So we both being geeks, we decided to take it to the next level and produce a daily BB newsletter to e-mail around the company, because lets be honest not everyone can take their work break at the same time. 

And it exploded from there, more and more people kept asking to be added to the distribution list and then we had people from outside the company asking to get it, after being forwarded by our colleagues.

In fact it got so big that the Big Boss's secretary came to see us on the quiet to let it us know that the boss was on the verge of finding out and if he did we'd be disciplined. 

Back then blogs were barely a thing, they definitely weren't mainstream. So we started publishing our newsletter on our own domain without even realising we were actually blogging. 

After a few years I left the company and our lives became more hectic and finally the unthinkable happened and I fell out of love with BB, so our 'blog' fell to the wayside.

Thankfully Dog has remained loyal to this day and encouraged me just before Christmas to give the next  CBB a chance in the new year......and boy was he right!

I'm hook, line and sinker into this CBB 2015 so much that I've started blogging about and I've managed to coerce Dog into adding his insightful views and comments to the blog.  

Celebrity Big Brother 2015 - The Fairytale

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Wednesday 7th Jan - The Live Launch

First housemate in (but not really!) was Katie Hopkins. Best known for being a Gob Shite. 

Ironically she doesn’t see herself as a Panto Villain but Emma Willis introduces her as the Wicked Witch. Katie also claims that she doesn’t need to be liked or popular. She’s totally going to be one of the first people to cry in the house

And straight in with a BB Twist, as far as the other housemates will be concerned she’s not even in the house yet, as BB invites Katie to step inside the Enchanted Mirror. To pass judgement on those who will be her fellow celeb housemates, and must pick the two she find least entertaining. What she doesn’t know is that those 2 will be up for the first public vote. 

I already want to scream “BORE OFF” at the screen because every other word is Scottish, Ginger and Fat. You don’t need to go on love we know you hate those things in people. We hate you but we’re not going to go on…for now. 

So the next, first housemate in was Patsy Kensit or as her mates know her ‘Mrs Pop Off’, best known for being the daughter of a gangster, an actress and Liam Gallagher’s ex-wife. She describes herself as a hopeless romantic that loves a wedding - she clearly doesn’t take herself seriously. I’d like to think of her as a sure bet to take on Katie when she’s bad mouthing people. 

The two added bonuses of Patsy are that she is a huge BB fan and she is very sweary - like me. 

Housemate number 2 was Perez Hilton, famous for his celebrity feuds and even more so for his celeb gossip blog. He is self titled the ‘Queen of all Media’. 

He’s another one claiming that he’s not trying to be liked by anybody or everyone, Believe me when I say he’ll be crying the first time he’s nominated. 

Up next was Ken Morley or as we know him Reg Holdsworth and lets be serious we will be calling him Reg not Ken for his duration. He says he has a volatile temper and only rows with women. He could be this series’ John McCririck. I expect him and Katie to be bickering like siblings. Despite him being one of the most mature housemates he’ll be first to throw his dummy out the pram over BB house rules.

Katie Hopkins Assessment Update

• Perez talks too much.
• Reg looks like he’s escaped from a care home and he’s just realised he’s been stitched up by his agent.
• Patsy looks awful 

Fourth up was……I have no idea but was apparently engaged to TOWIEs Kirk (but not now) and is an alternative tattoo model. Oh and her name is Cami Li. Her opinion on living with other women “Bitches be cray!” and of course she’s gone down the road of she’s come on CBB to prove beautiful people can be smart too. 

Housemate number 5 was Calum Best and you can see where this is going, putting him in straight after Cami. He is best known for being a TV personality and George Best’s son. He says he is no longer a playboy and not looking for love in the house either, yeah leopard and spots come to mind. 

Next in, as housemate number 6, was Alicia Douvall a self proclaimed Kiss & Tell Glamour Model and cosmetic surgery freak….350 different cosmetic procedures she’s had done in total and then had to have had half of them removed. 

She said that although the tabloids had alluded, in the past, to her having ‘relations’ with Calum Best, they’ve never even kissed. To be honest he looked like he wanted to punch her when she went in. 

Perez keep spouting facts at each new housemate enters the house, about themselves, in getting both annoying and boring. We have Wikipedia for such things.

Alexander O’Neal was the seventh housemate in, surely he’s making enough in royalties to just quick back and relax in his twilight years. Ain’t nobody need that shit at his age! I predict him to sit on the fence and enjoy being faffed around and waited on by doting housemates. 

Katie Hopkins Assessment Update

• Alicia, that’s a face that isn’t going to look good in the morning without make-up.
• Alexander, biggest disappointment so far and looks like he’s wearing a charity store suit with white pumps.
• Cami, effectively a hooker that gets her tits out.

Oohhh! You’ve gone too far with the comments about Alexander O’Neal, Katie, you’ve proper pissed of Emma Willis

Housemate number 8 was the lovely Nadia Swalha - Actress, TV Presenter and winner of Celebrity Master Chef. Nadia says that she hates people that are nasty for nasty sake (That’ll be Katie then). She also confesses she is doing CBB so that she can afford to have her kitchen extended but she is a huge BB fan anyway and is “ready to play the game”.

Next in, housemate number 9, was Jeremy Jackson possibly the biggest WHHHHOOOOO? of the night. Apparently he was the child actor that played David Hasslehoff’s son in Baywatch & huge fuck up ever since. Huge ego and fruit loop, he has even dressed like one.

O-M-G he just had a proper grope of Emma Willis’ bum, you’re lucky that Matt McBusted is in hospital mate. 

I’m glad he brought his Vapour cigarette because he’s already looking like this series Vanessa Feltz and without nicotine he could be your worst nightmare.

Katie Hopkins Assessment Update

• Says that she must be the only normal person in the house.
• Nadia, might normal when she calms down and now they have a good cook.
• Jeremy, some kid who was on the telly when he was 2 and now he’s here aged 28 acting like a prat.
• Perez still hasn’t stopped talking. 
• Basically it looks like small child’s party and all the kids are called Tyler.

Housemate number 9 was Kavana of ‘I can make you feel good” 90’s fame and The Big Reunion. He’s description of himself is that he got famous very young (16) off the back of that song and then lost it all, including his mind. Apparently Amy Winehouse nicknamed Chavana and that says it all. 

On entering the house Perez immediately outs him as a ‘fellow gay’ ….. Was that public knowledge??!!

Up next and number 10 was Michelle Visage, a TV presenter on Ru Pauls Drag Race. Yet another one self proclaiming she “Doesn’t need to make friends”. Michelle also says that anything she would say behind your back she’d say to your face. The American Katie perhaps.

Katie Hopkins Assessment Update

• She’s now calling all the housemates Freaks.
• Michelle, might be a laugh once she stops screaming “Sha-Wow!”

Chloe Goodman is Housemate 11, known for being a model and a reality star from ‘Ex on the Beach”. States she hates boring people and people that take themselves too seriously. Basically Chloe is another possible conquest for Calum, but she seems quite switched on and I’m also a possible fan based solely on that she has a Sausage dog.

Best housemate greeting of the night, goes to Patsy Kensit. On meeting Chloe “Have you had a chewing gum? Your breath smells lovely”. Who says that?!

Last but not least, Keith Chegwin has gone into the house. TV Personality for over 42 years and a little bit cringe. He does however admit that people call him wanker in the street. Best promise made so far - that Cheggars won’t get naked. He’s also been sober for 22 years - what could go wrong?

Warming to Cheggars a bit, totally star struck by Alexander O’Neal and seems to be great friends with Patsy.

Katie Hopkins Assessment Update

• Chloe, seems to have two assets and they are both on show.
• Cheggars is cute, probably sweet and loving.

And now Katie has been moved to the diary room, to tell Big Brother the two people she finds least entertaining but there is a twist, of course, the two Katie has named will be the first to face the public vote.

And Katie’s reward …. ? The Enchanted Mirror has placed a curse on her, until further notice . She can only be kind and courteous to the other housemates and has to be the first to console Chloe & Alexander when they find out they’re up for the public vote. If she doesn’t do these things she will face her own personal nightmare. 

So Katie goes back into the house, as housemate number 13 and so far is playing by the BB / Enchanted Mirror rules.

As soon as the Enchanted Mirror started talking to all the housemates, Kavana & Michelle were full on panicking before she even mentions that ‘she’ (the Enchanted Mirror) has deemed two housemates to be least entertaining and that is Chloe & Alexander.